We derive a tight link between the profitability, valuation and resilience of global systemically important banks (G-SIBs). We measure profitability using return on equity (ROE), valuation with the price-to-book ratio and resilience through the capital headroom above regulatory requirements (“management buffer”). We find that price-to-book ratios increase in analysts’ ROE forecasts and in banks’ management buffers. We also document that low-valued G-SIBs maintain management buffers by reducing risk-weighted assets and cater to investors by paying out their entire profits. However, the resilience of low-valued G-SIBs could prove precarious as they frequently incur substantial losses that trigger significant negative stock-market reactions.